Chop Chop Ouey 9/2/08

09 Apr

 Landon and I recently got back from a long trip to Pennsylvania.  It worked out really nicely.  I had a trip to NY during our stay.  Landon got to spend some nice time with her cousins and Aunt & Uncle. 

Just before our trip to PA and NY, we had some excitement.  We had a HUGE rainstorm (and they are rare in Denver).  Well I mean I was looking for Noah and rounding up my cats.  I had the recycle bin out front and thought I should get that in because the rain may knock it over.  But law requires that you do not leave your 19 month old unattended during waking hours.  I thought well I’ll just wait til she goes to bed.  So 30 minutes pass, Landon is asleep and I go out to get the recycle bin.  I can’t find it.    I look up to see if floating down 6th avenue – major road  (and in the wrong direction – a one way street).  OMG.  There was no way to catch it.  To top it off it was headed directly for an oncoming traffic… lovely.  I never found it, perhaps it floated off to Sante Fe or something.  It has now been replaced but bears our house number.  I must be more careful or face the repercussions of a float and run.

The night before our trip I was a bit frantic trying to get things together.  I loaded the dishwasher per normal.  I mistakenly put one of my new knives in there (Henkel I think).  Sharp as heck.   Well Landon is quite fond of the dishwasher and its dirty contents.  In fact, she will lay on the open door if allowed.  Thinks that is just hilarious.  So she grabs the one and only sharp knife.  Instinct took over and I grabbed it from her (to avoid her getting hurt).  Lets recap – she had the handle and I grabbed the blade – she won. I ended up with a pretty good stream of blood (which I think Landon mistook for catsup – her personal favorite food group).  My neighbor and friend, Erin, saved the day. She helped me stop the bleeding and watched the Princess while I drove myself to get stitches.    I ended up w/ three stitches, nothing dramatic.  I am going to tell you though that the actual 4 shots to numb my hand hurt like hell.  The nice doctor was trying to be all chatty so that I would not notice the excruciating pain he was inflicting.  I told him “it’s a good thing you are holding my hand as I am afraid I might have to punch you otherwise”.  We were close friends by this point you see.  He asked me when I got in there “how did this happen?”.  I said “I grabbed a knife from my daughter”.    He said “oh… we have someone you need to speak with.”  I told him “no, no, she is 19 months old, not 19” – still not sure I helped my parenting case, but I did get our without a visit with social services.  Never a dull moment on Steele Street.

 During my visit in PA, my niece (with the frankness only a 9 year old can get away with) Andrea proceeded to share some deep thoughts.  She said “um… Aunt Kelly you know you caught the bouquet at Mom and Dad’s wedding and that was um… like…um… 13 years ago.  You are supposed to get married when that happens and um, well that is like really not happening.”  How illuminating – the mystery is now solved.

 She follows that up later in the day with “you are older than Mom, right”.  Well yes dear.  “Oh, you look younger than her…..  except for when you smile and open your mouth.  You know you have wrinkles Aunt Kelly – that’s when they really show”….. as if the mirror does not confirm this sobering fact daily.   

 Just wait til she gets braces or a pimple – Aunt Kelly’s wrinkles will be looking pretty darn good then.

 We are working on potty training.  By that I mean that I have it out in the bathroom.  Landon thinks it’s the most fun to sit on it with her clothes on or wear it on her head as an hat.    I have tried a few times to get her to use it.  The other night, I got her out of the tub and said “wanna pee pee”. She said PPPPPEEEEEEEEEEE PPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEE! – and walks in the potty direction.  I hear this splashing and giggling.  I think to myself “gosh I know I dried her off to some degree.    Well, and I know you see this coming, it was not bath water but PEE PEE. She did not quite make the potty but just pee’d standing up and then splashed all in it.  Good grief!  So we start over, bath #2.  Grr!!!   Bath number 2 was better, however, I had wine!

Clyde and Bonnie (my kitties) had their mobile vet visits this week during the one day Landon was out sick.  You can imagine the excitement.   Bonnie had a dental and clyde got his Lion cut.  He is a really hairy beast so this works nicely.  Well there were balls of his hair all over the backyard from Clyde.    Sunday a.m. Landon slept in a bit which gave me a bit of time to clean it up.  I bent down to pick up one particular ball of fur.  Well friends it was really odd looking, sort of like a hairy mushroom  – of note here is that I didn’t have my contacts in.  Coming within 2 inches of it, I stopped dead in my tracks because………………… it was a …………….. BAT!!!!!    I swear!    Bat Down! Bat Down!  I am serious if you did not hear me screaming (regardless of your location)  you need to seek immediate medical attention as you are hearing impaired.  He wasn’t dead – just injured.  I made my neighbor (a brave man) come remove him.  I had to go right past him to get to my car. If Jerry hadn’t gotten him out of there,   Landon would have been riding to school in a cab.  Stay tuned for further details on our expanded petting zoo.

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Posted by on April 9, 2010 in Uncategorized


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