The Glamorous Life

21 Jun

This weekend was marked by sickness and…. Pink… Really it is always pink around here…. Medicine, eyes, clothes, nail polish, drinks, dolls…. I mean it is everywhere.

Both my girls had pink eye (which is perhaps my hated illness now). We enjoyed our local farmers market for a bit (and by bit I mean 35 minutes) Saturday. As we are about ready to head out the door, I am thinking you know I actually look okay today – hope I see a cute man.  I kept smelling poop – totally looking to Tennyson as the culprit.   Nope – Landon? Nope. Hmmm. I look down at my HUGE bust (Okay so not really but…) and notice a stripe of poop – CRAP. How… I mean how…. I have had this on for all of  17 minutes?

I am finding 3 to be the age of the liar. Anyone else find this to be true?
Landon had 3 peepops (suckers) in her mouth which prompted a stern and questioning look. “Landon how did you get those 3 peepops?” Wheels turning, weaving story, assessing the anger level…”Mommy, jus…give me chance……it was accdent” I noticed it was also an “accdent” when she had my bra on backwards (just leave it ….too easy) and was using my clinique Bonfire lip gloss on her Caillou doll (always did think he was gay….)

Both girls are on the mend… We nourished ourselves with many popsicles this over the weekend. I am not sure what would possess someone to manufacture a wedgelike popsicle but…. they cause all sort of issues. The kids can’t open them, they are slippery, they are in there too tightly to actually scoot them up. So they push and push and get all worked up only to finally get enough give to shoot the damn thing across the table and onto the TV screen. …
Mama Buy? — hell no, not unless you plan to wear a garbage bag and cover the entire dining area in plastic.

Finally we are dealing w/ insurance.  Lordy could go on forever about that.   You will recall (perhaps) my recent task of retrieving Tennyson’s poop for testing (also recalling it was not to be contaminated with her urine ?????)  Totally standard (oh and COVERED) for foreign adoptions.  Very glamorous and sense of smell  virtually gone.  Tests back – no parasites — no problems.   Thank God.   Bill arrived $681.55.  Cigna not paying as it was coded as “administrative”.   “Ma’am… how is testing of fecal matter (I sound smarter this way) administrative?  Administrative to me is a letter to my staff”.   Big fight between physician, Cigna and hospital performing lab tests. Then they told me that it was not covered because she was not actually on site during the testing.  “Ma’am – seriously what would you have done…..squeeze it out of her? She is not a tube of toothpaste”.

We are going back and forth now trying to resolve this – latest is Cigna says this was not medically required.    Honestly…. I don’t know what to say ….like I am sitting here with nothing to do but random shit testing?


Posted by on June 21, 2010 in Uncategorized


2 responses to “The Glamorous Life

  1. Marge Roate

    June 21, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    Pardon this repeated assessment of your cousin Emily and Ed ……You are truly living the dream! Okay so a bit of nightmare creeps in on occasion….but dream none the less! Bless ya hearts. Aunt Margie

  2. jane R

    July 3, 2010 at 11:06 pm

    kelly, I just love the way you write! Very entertaining! My daughter was adopted from China in 1996 and her speech patterns were so similar to your kids now. They are just adorable. Enjoy them!


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