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Afternoon Delight

31 May

I took my oldest to the movie.
Sort of a special Mom/daughter thing.

We saw Kung Fu Panda 2
why?
Did we need two Kung Fu Panda movies?

Anyway

This is a kids’ movie…
And violent…
A lot.
Flying wolves…
With one eye
And canons shooting holes in various animals.

“how many times do I have to kill you?  Somebody just kill him”

From the mean white peacock.

Nice Dreamworks.

Thank you for the nightmares…

and crowded bed which are sure to come.

On the way back to our car…
And post frozen yogurt with sprinkles and gummy worms…
We?

Have a lot of energy

So …

Squirming…

“Mommy I not want to walk”

Collapse

Drama

Hair flip

Hand on hip.

BIG DRAMA

Okay…

I just took you to a movie…
and a crappy one…

Let me assure you I would have rather been getting a pedicure.

And in this fit of madness…

She climbs on to hood of a car…

No…

Not ours.

Like a redneck at a drive-in.
What the hell?

I mean I saw her walking toward it…
But we are not heathens.

ACCKK!

If you have kids…

You know they do things…

Which you just cannot believe

Like grabbing Mrs. Keeter’s boob

at the Christmas party.

Well!
I cannot breathe.
Seriously, think I need a cute paramedic…
And am wondering if I can stomp out 911
In my espadrilles.

I just cannot believe this…
“LANDON NOOOOOOOOOOO…. GET DOWN”

Which just makes it all the more funny.

And serves as an involuntary trigger to crawl up HIGHER.

OMG.
WHO? is this child?

And people?
People?

There is a man in the car…

IN THE DAMN CAR

I SWEAR.

Grabbing her…

Mouthing my apologizes to him.

Hands in the air in despair…

Planning my name and contact information if questioned…

Mitzi

Fleishman

My fake names always sound like Jewish stripper.

I just..
What is happening here?
Maybe he can’t actually see me.

And do you know what people?
He smiled at me…
winked…
And raised his can.

His can of BEER…
This dude! was having a brewski…
In the parking lot…
Before catching a flick.
At 3:30 in the afternoon.


But sadly?

He looked NOTHING like this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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3 Comments

Posted by on May 31, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

3 responses to “Afternoon Delight

  1. Lori stefanac (Lola)

    June 1, 2011 at 4:56 am

    I can’t believe your child scampered up onto someone else’s car! That’s a riot! She might actually give MY boys a run for their money. So, Kung Fu Panda was no good? My boys are old enough not to be freaked out by cartoon violence…or violence. Unfortunately they are quite desensitized. Oh well. That’s what you get when your husband thinks that Saw IV is a good choice for children.

     
  2. Becca

    June 2, 2011 at 9:45 am

    OMG this made me laugh. For a few reasons! Was Landon trying to reproduce a kung fu move from the hood of the car?!

     
    • kellyozley

      June 6, 2011 at 8:53 pm

      God only knows what that girl was up to. I am so glad you enjoyed this.

       

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