28 Nov

Landon has a friend…

I met her tonight.


I could hear them


“Oh yea…

Me too.

I has to ask my mom…

She probably say no.


 “Oh… my… GOSH…

are you serious?”




Walking in the bathroom…



To whom are you speaking?”

“Um…my friend”



“oh yea…me too”




Is your friend?”


Eye roll.

Hand on hip.

I must remind myself that?

despite her apparent disgust with me…

She is still only 4.


right dere…

in da bathtub”


I see only?

the random toy

and my spilled bottle…

of Biolage Color Care Shampoo




Mommies cannot…


her friend.



What is her name”




I am sorry.

Is she?

A high end

H  O  O  K  E  R?


But their conversation?

is a scream.


Are you kidding me?”


“I love it…

Oh yea…

My Mom did my hair like dat too…”

“I really like dat pink…

I’m going to ask my Mommy if I can has dat too Magenta”


“Landon don’t you have any other friends here?”

Like with normal names?

“Oh well…

Magenta’s muther is here”


“Oh really?

And what is her name?”

“Pink Frosting”



“Magenta’s mother is Pink Frosting?”


More eye rolling.

And I say it.

What I heard all my life…

mostly from my parents…

 “if you keep doing that, your eyes will get stuck that way”


And then?

I ask her to get out of the tub.


I has a go…

My mommy is making me…

Get out of da bathtub”


Pink Frosting says you are a mean Mommy”


“does she now?”


at least…

I did not…

name you Fuchsia”



30 second pause…

hey Mom?”



“could my name really be Fuchsia?”


Oh God!

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Posted by on November 28, 2011 in Misbehaving


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