RSS

The Shit Prize

30 Jan

I?

Cooked poop today.

 

That?

Is not a reflection of my cooking ability.

Although there are times…

 

I washed poop.

Quite by accident.

Tenny is potty training.

And honestly?

We are there…

cept for that pesky pooping.

 

The girls are getting ready for school.

And by that I mean dragging every toy out and throwing it in the air.

 

Switching load #5 from the washer to the dryer.

Hmmm

What is that?

A marble?

How that did get in the washer?

You know I tell those girls all the time to take stuff out of their pockets.

I have one barrette, 2 lip glosses, 3 sticker sets and 47 jelly beans…

In my “washed” collection.

 

Round.

Brown.

Kind of shiny.

 

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

 

Is this poop?

In my flippin’ washing machine.

It is!

It

Is

Poop!

I have washed poop.

Actually I have bleached poop.

Because it was the whites.

 

Grabbing the paper towel…

I snag the little sucker.

And I am just annoyed.

Annoyed that Tennyson is not able to poop in the potty yet.

Annoyed that I didn’t get all of poop out of her big girl panties.

JUST ANNOYED!

 

I give the washing machine tub a spin.

Just in case.

Like the Price is Right.

 

Only…

My prize is shit.

SHIT!

Ping

Ping

Ping

 

Little poop balls are firing around the washing tub.

So here I am

In my sweats

Half in

Half out

of the washing machine.

 

I hear the pad of little feet approach.

Tennyson approach’eth

 

“MOMMY!”

Which even though I know she is there…

Scares the crap out of me and makes me hit my head on the top of the washer.

“what is it?”

 

“Mommy?  What choo doin’?”

“I am cleaning poop out of the washer.”

 

“Mommy?”

“Yes?”

 

“dat nasty!”

 

Yea…no kidding.

 

So I clean out the poop.

409 the washer

Run load #5 again as load #6…

on the 2 hour sanitize wash…

And get the kids to school.

All the while wondering…

why?

Me?

Advertisements
 
1 Comment

Posted by on January 30, 2012 in Misbehaving, Poop, Potty, Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , ,

One response to “The Shit Prize

  1. Marge Roate

    January 31, 2012 at 10:18 am

    Oh Kelly….this experience should spiral your self-esteem upward significantly. Why? Just think of the multitude of people who don’t think they are worth a shit! Not you! You have the full awareness!! Bless your heart! Aunt Margie

     

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: