There are things you do not want to hear
or know about,
From your family.
And certainly your mother.
Especially when you mother is Southern.
When your mama is Southern…
all comments come with a tinge of judgement.
It is not intended you see..
Just a consequence of being born and raised,
south of the Mason Dixon line.
“What is wrong with Landon’s shoes?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well they look awful…
Like she drug her feet out of from underneath the car.”
are you like the Flintstones now?
“Mom, she wears them everyday.”
“Well I swainee, I never seen such a thing…
that is a crime…
a real disgrace.”
So over the holidays
My mom was here.
And one day…
can you hear me over the racket.”
Kathie Lee and Hoda)
“I think George is horny”
(George is a cat)
does she even know what that means?
If I do not answer…she will stop, right?
Can’t you here me talkin’ a’ you?
George is makin’ dough on Clooney
And looking at her.
He is rubbin’ all over her.
I think he wants to get him some.”
You might want to do something about that.”
Both cats are basically androgynous at this point
so not likely the issue.
What could I possibly do to “do something”?